I arranged for L to take a swimming evaluation and start private lessons. My error? I did all of this a couple of days ago and somehow forgot to tell him.

M: “L, we’re going to go swimming today! Woo hoo!”

L: “What do you mean?”

M: “We’re (I’m using the royal WE) going to a great, heated pool and are going to see where you are and then start lessons.”

L: “WHAT?! I’ve been taking lessons at school for three years.”

M: “Yes, and they just concluded, so now you get to have cool, individual lessons.”

L: “Why didn’t you tell me? What if I drown? What if I’m not good enough? Mom, this is the kind of thing I need to prepare for. I need to have enough time to mentally get myself ready. You can’t just spring this on me. This is becoming a problem. You sign me up for things but you don’t ask me and you don’t give me enough notice. This doesn’t work for me. Who knows if these people can really swim? If I’ll be supervised? Do you want me at the bottom of the pool?”

M: “Got it. Discuss then act.”