Cleanliness

L spent the latter half of his spring break solo with dad in a cabin. Here’s something that I think is basically true (with exceptions, of course). When the fellas are hanging out with other fellas, they ingest only cured meat products, their mouths clamp shut if faced with a vegetable or a fruit, and they forgo bathing at all costs.

I suppose a mother should expect such things. I can only hope we’ve averted scurvy.

To that, soapy, warm, clean L.

floating head

Awkward or Dear?

L had a buddy hang out for a few days during his spring break. I had to leave early and drove his buddy home from our Spring Break casa. Hugs were exchanged by all.

L hugged his buddy and said, “I love you.”

Buddy: Hmmm… mmmkay.

L: “I, uh, love you like a brother. You know, I like/love you.”

Buddy: Yup.

L: “Or, you know, I think you’re great and thank you for coming.”

Buddy: Me, too.

PAUSE

L: “Awkward?”

 

Eight or 18?

Some ramblings from last night:

L: “I think L and I broke up. I think we’re better as friends.”

M: “You broke up? Broke up from what? What do you mean?”

L: “Well, she was crushing pretty hard on me and I really like her, but in the end, I think we’ll be friends.”

M: (Aghast.)

L: “So now, I’m thinking about C only I think she likes V and I’m not sure I’ll get anywhere with that.”

M: “Where is ‘anywhere?'”

L: “You know, when you like someone. LIKE like.”

M: “I think you and dad are going to have that talk sooner rather than later.”

L: “Oh, gross. Do we have to?”

Past Tense, or “She’s So Fine”

Had a flashback this morning.

The Setting: Oscar broadcast, 2005 (I think).

The Presenter: Salma Hayek. I believe L is on the verge of walking, is still sporting diapers, and is quite mobile.

He crawls/scootches/drags himself to the television set, hoists himself up and plants a giant, wet, all-in kiss on Miss Hayek while she’s trilling about “Best….”

STOP

Did my unsullied, innocent cherub just French Salma Hayek?

Why, yes. Yes he did. (Good taste.)

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